Anxiety in my chest, I want to fight the world.

Stressing out. It's hard to have so many responsibilities on top of dealing with college shit. I thought every thing would be gravy once I submitted my apps, but I still have to deal with scholarships and supplemental questionnaires and the FEAR of rejection.

AYS has been dying. I go into every Tuesday meeting what the hell I'm gonna talk to them about. Today was bad. It's so hard trying to lead a club when your friends think it's cool to be an asshole to you in front of everyone. Like, okay, we're friends and this would be acceptable OUTSIDE of the club, but your attitude towards me is not going to attract new members. I barely see Tony D. so I be feeling hella lost. Assembly is April 17th, and guess what? So is the Teacher Talent Show and Prom. I'm gonna fight someone. PROMISE.

My chest is tight, and tonight's Glee made me so mad.

New guys I just wanna deny,

The guys who have shown interest in me recently are black. I don't know how to act. They spit the same lines at different girls (I'm not stereotyping, this is a fact) and are just looking for someone to get it in with. You think you're smooth asking, "You think I'm handsome?" calm yo balls.
Except I'm only describing one guy. The other guy is okay. Nice. Doesn't seem like a player (although his Twitter speaks otherwise). Again, I don't know how to act.

It's funny because I'm positive both of them smoke equal amounts of weed each day. Nigga, please.

Love Life

Non-existent and happy with it. I understand what went wrong in my last relationship and I accept it.

In other news, I've been too lazy to party lately. I just wanna go out, come home before midnight, and knock the fuck out. Maybe even come home before eleven.

Winterball 2012

It's really nice to have a set of good friends. Winterball was great because I was able to bounce from group to group dancing with randomass people and not give a fuck. My only regret was rolling in a little bit tipsy, because I'm pretty sure Mr. Anderson knew. Very unprofessional of me. But whatever, I had fun dancing. That's all I want to do.

Oh hey, I got new glasses! $7.95! I only had to pay for shipping! Fuck yeah, Coastal.com! You get your first pair free. I've been waiting for my glasses to come for like a week when they've been sitting near my home phone since last Thursday. My mom just forgot to tell me. T.T

Prom Dates

I used to SMH hella hard at girls who tripped about not having a date to prom, but now I kind of understand them. Honestly, I just want someone to take a muthafucking picture with so I can give it out to my friends and mentors. I'm not looking for anything romantic. I just wanna have fun and as long as my date doesn't get in my way, I'm solid!

Shane told me it'd be easy for me to find a date, Boy, was he wrong. I wish I was a witch so I could make my perfect man out of dough, like on Sabrina the Teenage Witch. I just need him to look pretty next to me while I look fucking ravishing and elegant as fuck.

I have this weird feeling,

I can't really talk to that foo casually anymore. It's like I have built-up resentment.

NYE

There was no solid plan for New Years Eve this year. We met at the Montclair parking lot at 9pm and everyone began to yell at eachother regarding where to go and what to do. I sat on the sidelines, as usual.
We ended up hopping on BART and getting to SF around 11:45. It was a fucking mission. Crowds of drunk and high people everywhere. I got lost from the group with Shane and Miranda while Austin tried to find Lauren before midnight. Miranda was drunk and I had to pee.
I didn't care for the rest of the night. I felt like I was the mama trying to keep my children safe.
By the end of the night, we ditched the others and ended up at Austin's House high as fuck. THAT is when I finally started to enjoy myself. Austin, Shane, Miranda, and I played card games and drank nasty vodka. I had Hella fun just being with those 3 people. Everything was fucking hilarious.
Next year, I'm keeping shit intimate.